Dirty Money

I couldn’t give the money in my pocket away fast enough today.

I went to the Corner Mart across the parking lot from my office for an afternoon pick-me-up of Diet Coke and a candy bar. Before I went to pay, I thought, I needed some cash to pick up some bait for fishing tomorrow, so I used the ATM in the store. I pulled out $40 in cash and went to the counter to pay for my snacks. I gave the lady $20 and she gave me my change. I pocketed it and walked back to the office.

When I walked in the door, all I could smell was skunkweed. I couldn’t figure where it was coming from at first, then, I pulled the cash out of my pocket to put it back in my wallet and that’s when I noticed it. It was like being slapped in the face with a polecat; it made my eyes water.

Seriously, how much do you have to smoke to make the money in your pocket stink like that?! It’s fucking foul; there are no other words.

I had to take the money out of my pocket and throw it in my drawer while eating lunch. I wound up giving it to one of the guys who’d bought pizza for everyone. He laughed asking if I was giving him the stinky money. Then, he put it in his pocket and couldn’t stand the smell shortly afterward. He took it to his desk to “air out”.